Nurturing Dancers: My True Calling

Have you ever lost sight of your purpose in the whirlwind of desire?

Over the past few weeks, I have been working hard to refine my Instagram page, create content, and design a website that accurately represents me and my brand. I have been so focused on promoting myself that I momentarily forgot why I was going through all this effort.

Me and some of my students from Utah <3

This past week, I had the opportunity to substitute teach at a local studio. My husband and I moved from Utah to Virginia in mid-November, and this was the first time since that move that I've been able to teach. Since then, I have been ceaselessly working on creating a brand image that showcases who I am as a teacher and choreographer. While I feel I have been true to myself throughout this process, subbing recentered me on my true purpose.

Monday evening, I handed out resumes to local studios, offering my subbing services. That very night, I received a text from a studio inviting me to teach tap the next night and jazz technique the night after. The next day, I was unbelievably excited. I was itching to be involved with dance again and my mood was vibrant. The dancers were extremely polite and had amazing technical foundations. Afterwards, I made sure to text the studio owner, thanking her for the chance to teach as well as commending her well-prepared dancers for their hard work. But then hours turned into a day and I didn't hear anything back.

I started to feel disappointed that she didn't answer and began to doubt myself. I think what I was looking for was some kind of sign that she either loved me or hated me, but all I got was silence.

I still came in the next day and taught. Again, I loved it, and the dancers seemed to enjoy themselves, but again, I was met with zero feedback. I found myself scrolling through Instagram, watching award-winning choreographers and famous dancers flood my page with hundreds of likes on their posts and thousands of followers. My heart sank as I questioned why I was putting such great effort into putting myself out there for dance opportunities.

As I wrote in my journal, it hit me: I don't teach for the recognition, awards, or to become a big-name choreographer (even though those are worthy goals and things I do strive for). I'm doing this because I love dance with my whole heart, and I want to market myself so that I can have more doors opened to me. I believe the praise-less work I am doing now will lead to greater opportunities to do what I adore. Not only that, but I take great pleasure in watching dancers grow. I love finding a dancer's deep potential and helping them discover it themselves so that they can become the dancer I know they can be.

So no, the studio owner did not shower me with words of awe regarding my teaching skills or choreographic creativity. But she did inadvertently help me realize the purpose behind all this work and remind me why I am on this journey. I love dance and I love to teach, and that will always be a driving force in all that I do.

Jazz Technique class: Combo